We meet Cora when she is 80, everything has changed.
Cora closed the door behind her, she looked at the empty bed. Her maid had just left. Jules was a lovely woman, but Cora still missed Baxter. A few months prior Baxter had handed in her notice and Cora totally got that. Baxter had got arthritis and wasn’t able to work anymore. Robert had made sure she could stop working and still live a comfortable live.
She got in the bed and turned on her side, she tried to avoid looking at the empty side. Especially now, Cora missed Baxter, she could have talked to her. When Rosamund died she lost her one friend and ally besides Robert and now……..
She repeated the conversation she had with Mary in her head.
*
“Mum, it is time you move to the dower house.”
Cora had looked up from her book in surprise. There wasn’t any talk about that before. Since Violet died the house was empty.
“Papa is gone now for a month, I think it is time to move on and live in the dower house.”
“But Mary?” Cora had stuttered. “I feel your dad’s presence here, I am not ready to live alone in that house.”
“Well, the estate is mine now and I say it is time.”
*
Cora wished she had stood up more firmly against her daughter, but she didn’t had the energy. She was broken, she missed Sybil and she craved for Robert’s arms. She turned around and pulled his pillow close, she forbid the maids to was his pillow, so she could still smell his smell on it.
She let go of her tears, she soaked the pillow, but she didn’t care. She was holding on to them for the whole day, she couldn’t hold it any longer. Sobbing she fell asleep.
+++
Cora woke up, feeling disoriented. She stretched out her arm, but the same second reality hit her. He wasn’t there and he would never be there anymore. She had lost the love of her life, after all these years he had left her. She remembered his final words: ‘I will always love you, even when I am not next to you.’
She took in a deep breath and slowly got up, her body was protesting. Her muscles ached, but what would you expect from a 80 year old body. She pulled the cord to let Jules know she was awake. She looked at Robert’s smiling face in the frame next to her bed.
She remembered taking this picture: It was about 20 years ago, they celebrated their 40th wedding anniversary. Robert had taken her to the south of France. Sybbie opened her villa for them, of course with the help of Tom and Lucy, she was just 10.
She took this picture when they were on a little boat trip. Robert said he wanted to do this trip to France all over again, and now with only good memories. When they first got to France, back when Sybbie inherited the villa, it was overshadowed by Cora’s illness.
Robert was wearing his dark navy suit, Cora fell in love all over again, when he appeared in that suit again. She remembered taking loads of pictures and Robert complaining she was wasting so many film roles.
A knock on the door shook her out of her memories. “Good morning, Milady.”
Cora tried to smile, but she felt it was a fake one and she knew Jules knew. She was a sweetheart and didn’t say anything. “Should I run you a warm bath this morning?” Jules said when she saw how stiff Cora got up from the bed.
+++
“Is her Ladyship awake?” Mary asked Jules when she saw her in the hallway.
“If have just ran her a bath, she is in it now. Can I give her a message?” Jules asked, trying to keep Mary out of the room.
“I will talk to her from the door, thank you.” Mary tried to pass Jules, but she was blocking the door. “Can you let me in?”
“Her Ladyship, is very tired. She will be down soon. If you excuse me, I am going to help her out of the bath.” Jules said firm and walked back in the room.
+++
“Milady, I can bring you a tray here in your room” Jules said, looking at the pale face of Cora.
Cora sat down in the chaise longue and nodded. She was trying to stay upstairs as long as possible, to avoid talking to Mary. She wish Edith was still here, but she had to go back home, to her own family.
Cora heard voices in the hallway. It was Andy who was talking to Jules. She couldn’t understand what they were saying.
When Thomas left for America, Carson had come back to train Andy. He had been a fast learner and Carson was very pleased.
Dear Carson, Cora thought. Robert was heartbroken when he died. He had grown up with him as a butler. Carson had died soon after his wife died. Mrs. Hughes was still missed in the house. Anna had taken over and although, she was a sweet woman. Nobody could replace Mrs. Hughes.
How times had changed. She was getting older herself, so obviously the staff did too. Daisy and Andy had children of their own. Mrs. Patmore had retired a few years prior and now Daisy was head cook.
And now Mary was forcing her out of her home, the home she hated when she first got here 58 years ago.
The first time Robert showed her the house she was scared to get lost. She was scared to move in the wrong way. Violet was watching her like a hawk, she also remembered the day Violet had moved to the dower house. Patrick had died a view years before. Robert said, she didn’t had to move out. But one day Violet came down and announced she was going to move. She was fed up with this big house and wanted to live smaller. So off she went.
She remembered that evening, she had fed Sybil and kissed Mary and Edith good night. When she got back down, Robert was waiting for her in the drawing room. She didn’t notice at first, but he was only wearing his dinner jacket, nothing underneath.
*
“I have sent the staff to bed, this is our first night without Mama in this house.” He pulled her close and kissed her neck.
Cora was cautious. “Are you sure, Carson has gone up?”
“Carson will not interrupt us.” He licked her earlobe.
*
Verhalen van Traan 