“Where are Papa and Mama?” Edith asked, while she put her bag in the hallway, next to Sybil’s.
“Maybe, they are still asleep, we should wake them before we go.” Sybil said.
Rosamund quickly stepped in front of the stairs, before one of the girls could go upstairs. “I will let them know you gave them your love. Come on, hurry up, you girls will miss the train. My driver is waiting for you outside.”
Sybil and Edith shared a look but picked up their things and walked outside.
Cora had been listening in from her bedroom door, she had wanted to run down and hug her girls. Their whole life was going to be turned upside down and she wished she could protect them from it. The rest of the night she had thought about what she said to Robert. She wanted a divorce. She had said it, no way back. Robert had left her room as a broken man. She almost went to his room to comfort him and tell him she was sorry. But she knew she had made the right decision, seeing Robert with Jane in her mind’s eye was something she would never loose. Every time he would touch her, she would be thinking of how he touched Jane. She heard the stairs crack; Rosamund was coming up. Cora stepped back and closed her door.
Rosamund had seen Cora’s door close, but she was not on her way to her. She had to see Robert. Cora told her about her decision after she had told it to Robert, and they had talked for a long-time last night. But now she needed to talk to Robert.
+++
Robert turned on his other side when he heard the door open. He did not care who it was, he did not want to see anybody. His head was pounding, he drank too much whiskey after Cora’s bombshell. According to the footsteps, it was not Cora who had entered his room, and he felt sad about that. He had a small hope that she would come and say that she regretted her words. He pulled the pillow over his head, trying to hide for the world.
Rosamund walked to his bedside and put a cup of water with some paracetamol down. She pulled a chair close and sat down. Seeing her brother in this state broke her heart. The moment Cora had stepped into his live, something had changed. He really started living because of her. She did not understand why he had done what he did. She understood Cora´s decision, only if Robert had come to her before he did something stupid. Why did he not talk with her, or at least with Cora. Rosamund sighed: “Robert, I have some painkillers for you.”
Robert removed the pillow from his head and swung his feet over the edge of the bed. He looked at Rosamund. “Thank you. Did the girls leave already?”
“They did, they do not know what happened yet.”
“You have not told them?” Robert asked.
“Of course not.” Rosamund said indignant. “That is not something I should tell, do I?”
“No, you are right. Cora and I should tell them.” Robert let out a deep sigh. “There is no more Cora and me.” Robert rested his pounding head in his hands. “Oh, Rosamund, I made a mess, a big mess and there is no way I can fix this.” He looked up when Rosamund stayed silent. “Or is there?” There was a little bit of hope in his voice.
Rosamund shook her head, she got up and sat down next to Robert, she wrapped her arm around his shoulders. “I am sorry my dear brother, I wish I could protect you from this pain, but there is no way back. Cora is adamant about the divorce, you hurt her very deep with Jane. And if you ask me, she is mostly hurt by the fact you kept her in the house and kept that letter. Robert?” Rosamund paused for a second. “Why did you keep that letter?”
Robert’s shoulders lowered. “I do not know.”
“Stop that, Robert, you know perfectly well why you hold on to it.” Rosamund said firm.
“There was a small part of me that still wanted Jane.” He looked at Rosamund to see her reaction. “A very, very small part was attracted to the excitement about something new, someone young. I should never have given in on that feeling.” He sighed again. Robert took the glass and paracetamol from the nightstand.
“Robert, everybody has those feelings sometimes when they see someone that is attractive, but acting on it is something different. You acted on those feelings, but most off all, you did not let them go. What had you done if Cora had died?”
Robert jerked back. “Are you implying I would start a relationship with Jane, had Cora died?”
“I am asking you; I am not implying, I am asking.” Rosamund said calmly.
“I have thought about it, what would happen if I had gone with Jane, but I realised it was a stupid fantasy. One that would not bring me any satisfaction, not as Cora did all these years. Cora made my life perfect, our three girls, our boy in heaven and everything she gave me. She made me who I am today, just because she was always there to support me.”
“You are painting her a saint now.” Rosamund said carefully.
“To me she is!” Robert looked at Rosamund. “Do you think she will go on with the divorce?”
Now Rosamund lowered her eyes. “Cora has her faults also, there was a reason why you felt attracted to Jane and why you searched comfort elsewhere. Do not blame everything on yourself. But I am sorry to say this, Cora is very, very certain about the divorce.”
Robert got up from the bed. “Well, I should get dressed. Downton is waiting.”
Rosamund looked how Robert disappeared into the ensuite bathroom. He was a true broken man she thought and in the room on the other side of this hallway, there was a heartbroken woman. Was there a way she could try and fix this for them? She should talk with her mother Violet; she could help maybe.
Verhalen van Traan 